Yesterday I watched the news in awe about the missing 16 year old girl, Abby. She is sailing around the world alone, at the age of 16. Her parents are defending "her" decision and theirs. Are they totally nuts is all I can think. I have had a lot on my shoulders with my husband living and working in Oklahoma..sometimes I feel I am raising our youngest alone. Sometimes it would SO MUCH easier to JUST SAY YES. But I know I can't...I don't want to look back years form now and say "....wow if only I had been stronger and not given in to her." I am HERE to guide her..I am her friend but I am her MOTHER!!
My youngest daughter is 16 and I would never dream of letting her sail alone or do anything else even somewhat similar to that w/o ADULT SUPERVISION! Although Cassie is mature and soon to be 17 she would in no way be ready to anything like that, even if she did have the skills required.
At that age their brains are not ready to handle ALL that alone time. The trauma that will come with being out there on the open seas alone, fighting the waves, the boredom, the terror that you KNOW will come.
I watch these reality shows on TV. Real World, Road Rules, Jersey Shore and all those...what have we done to our children with these shows? We've shown them that sleeping around, swearing, drinking and pretty much doing anything you can to get on TV is the way to go. Can you really, honestly, blame them?
I can't blame the teens for alot of what they do these days. Both parents work, parents are divorced, parents just "give in" due to threats; ...."If you don't let me (go out, see him/her etc.) I'll run away".."If....I'll kill myself.." the list of threats go on and on. Why? Because we as parents let them.
Both of my girls, at one time in their lives, threatened to run away when they were not allowed to do something. So we grabbed a bag and handed it to them and I said go ahead I'll help you pack and walked away. The look on their faces was classic. There was NO discussion! Or the time they threatened to call the police on us if we spanked them....so we handed them the phone! Of the time my one daughter told me she was a "cutter". Why? Because her friend did it to get attention from her parents. That is so sad and I felt so bad for her friend...I do blame the parents for that. But I told my child..no way it won't work with us. Of course as parents my husband and I had a discussion and we did sit afterwards and talk with our daughter to get to the root of the problem.
So, again, I ask when did we stop being parents and start being friends. When did we stop saying OKAY to everything our CHILDREN want? Do we not see the harm we are doing? Our children are growing into a ME generation. It is all about ME. I hear, all to often, "well I have to let them express themselves"! Yes I let my children express themselves but I do NOT let them express themselves in harmful ways, or in adult ways. I think some parents are taking the easy way out and just saying YES way too much...and that is sad.
If my child wanted to sail around the world, alone, I as a loving, caring parent could not have let it happen. Because my brain can understand ALL that COULD happen...she would only see what MY happen with the out-come being "I'll be famous, I'll be on TV..."
So to my girls; I want to be your friend but more than anything I want to be your mom. I want to honor you as your parent because God gave me YOU. He gave you to me to keep you safe, to teach you right from wrong, to let you learn and grow but to NOT let you make decisions that could harm yourself or others! To not let you, hopefully, choose a path filled with immoral wrongs. I'm not perfect, I know that. But just like my mother said when I was your age..."trust me I've been there I know what is best for you" and she really did. Thanks MOM!!
Well after living apart for over 10 months we are all FINALLY living in the same state! Chris found work in Oklahoma in October 2009. Our oldest daughter, Brittany, moved down to work for Chris & start college in April of this year. As for Cassie & I, well we held down the "fort" in Michigan. The house didn't sell so we finally leased it out..loaded up a 26' U-Haul truck with a 6'x12' trailer behind it..& headed down to Oklahoma! So a new ADVENTURE BEGINS!
Friday, June 11, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
24 HOURS~~"IT"......
24 HOURS ~~ That is all it takes, sometimes less, for things to change. You've got a plan...everything is "lined up", "layed out" according to YOUR plan...and WHAM 24 hours later your "plan" is gone. Well let's not say GONE GONE let's say it your plan has been deviated, way-laid, post-poned, you get the idea.
Monday night, I had a plan, I really did. I knew what was coming up (well sort-of if it went "my way"). I just knew what was going to happen, when it "would" happen and how it would happen. Tuesday night WHAM plan change. I still knew "IT" was going to happen, but "IT" got delayed. So another "IT" took the first "IT's" place.
So then Wednesday rolled around...and guess what? Another 24hours and "IT" changed again. So my first "IT" is STILL delayed, but delayed even further and now I have a new "IT". Unfortunately.
As much as "IT" changes some of "IT'S" stay the same. The house is still on the market, my husband and oldest daughter are still in Oklahoma waiting. There at still alot of "IT'S" that need packed and things to do around here. But the BIG "IT"..the really BIG "IT" in my life right now has to happen. Even that "IT" has changed. I knew I had to get my big "IT" fixed, that is my back. I knew it would probably be surgery but I had NO IDEA it was going to THAT SURGERY!! I had no idea I was going to have to have 2 rods, 4 screws and a plate put in! UGH UGH UGH So I got home, read over all the paperwork. Told Chris, told Cassie, told Britt and told my mom. Oh yeah I also talked to my sis-in-law and she knows :-) I didn't cry, I wasn't worried I just knew by other "IT" was delayed but alot of "IT'S" were still going to happen, somehow. I did good UNTIL I sat down last night and read the paperwork they give you. You know the one, the one with ALL the "this could happen to you" descriptions. I know, I know they have to give it to you...but by the time I finished reading it I was like this "IT" is NOT going to happen. So I called Chris and cried to him and yes "IT" is going to happen. I need, no I must, get back to normal. LOL What is normal? Well at least I'll be able to, next year at this, time have a garden, ride horses, and do all the things I love to do PAIN FREE. Of course in the "paperwork" they do tell you that you could still have pain or more pain or diff. pain. I won't...if anything I have ALWAYS been positive about the outcome of any surgery I may face..and "IT'S" all been good.
So the date is set and now I wait and do what I need to do to prepare for my new big "IT". Of course there is another 24 hours that will go by and who knows what "IT" will change. Only God knows and as much as I would like to keep my "IT'S" in order I can't...I just have my "free will" from God and that can be my lists' of "IT'S" and as I make my list I know, deep inside, HE is in charge of the "IT" LIST and I'm okay with that, I really am. Because God is there holding my hand, standing by me, looking over my shoulder and every once in a while when I make another one of my hundred "IT LISTS" I will hear a little chuckle. God does have a sense of humour, thank goodness!!
Monday night, I had a plan, I really did. I knew what was coming up (well sort-of if it went "my way"). I just knew what was going to happen, when it "would" happen and how it would happen. Tuesday night WHAM plan change. I still knew "IT" was going to happen, but "IT" got delayed. So another "IT" took the first "IT's" place.
So then Wednesday rolled around...and guess what? Another 24hours and "IT" changed again. So my first "IT" is STILL delayed, but delayed even further and now I have a new "IT". Unfortunately.
As much as "IT" changes some of "IT'S" stay the same. The house is still on the market, my husband and oldest daughter are still in Oklahoma waiting. There at still alot of "IT'S" that need packed and things to do around here. But the BIG "IT"..the really BIG "IT" in my life right now has to happen. Even that "IT" has changed. I knew I had to get my big "IT" fixed, that is my back. I knew it would probably be surgery but I had NO IDEA it was going to THAT SURGERY!! I had no idea I was going to have to have 2 rods, 4 screws and a plate put in! UGH UGH UGH So I got home, read over all the paperwork. Told Chris, told Cassie, told Britt and told my mom. Oh yeah I also talked to my sis-in-law and she knows :-) I didn't cry, I wasn't worried I just knew by other "IT" was delayed but alot of "IT'S" were still going to happen, somehow. I did good UNTIL I sat down last night and read the paperwork they give you. You know the one, the one with ALL the "this could happen to you" descriptions. I know, I know they have to give it to you...but by the time I finished reading it I was like this "IT" is NOT going to happen. So I called Chris and cried to him and yes "IT" is going to happen. I need, no I must, get back to normal. LOL What is normal? Well at least I'll be able to, next year at this, time have a garden, ride horses, and do all the things I love to do PAIN FREE. Of course in the "paperwork" they do tell you that you could still have pain or more pain or diff. pain. I won't...if anything I have ALWAYS been positive about the outcome of any surgery I may face..and "IT'S" all been good.
So the date is set and now I wait and do what I need to do to prepare for my new big "IT". Of course there is another 24 hours that will go by and who knows what "IT" will change. Only God knows and as much as I would like to keep my "IT'S" in order I can't...I just have my "free will" from God and that can be my lists' of "IT'S" and as I make my list I know, deep inside, HE is in charge of the "IT" LIST and I'm okay with that, I really am. Because God is there holding my hand, standing by me, looking over my shoulder and every once in a while when I make another one of my hundred "IT LISTS" I will hear a little chuckle. God does have a sense of humour, thank goodness!!
Monday, June 7, 2010
Broke or Not Broke..That is the Question
You get that phone call in the middle of night, when your spouse is out of town, and you know the minute you say hello something isn't right. The ton, background noise or just that "feeling" inside tells you something isn't right.
My husband, Chris, was a professional bull-rider for over 15 years. He has broken over 20 bones in his body and had a few concussions. Everyone always asks me how could I stand it? How could I let him? Well first off he had been riding over 6 years when we met, I couldn't very well tell him to stop. I was young and it was "exciting" to date a bull-rider. Second I stood it because it was part of his life and I gave him up to God each and every ride to keep him safe. I knew there would harm, not a question of if he gets hurt but a question of when and how bad.
Chris retired from bull-riding about 15 years ago. He went out on top, winning a local rodeo here in Michigan. I remember clearly a phone call I got one night. Usually I would attend each and every rodeo but with the girls and the cost it was cheaper to have him jump in the truck with a group of guys. I remember the night so clearly. I put the girls to bed, picked up around the house and I went to bed. Knowing that I'd get a call later in the night from Chris telling me how he did. So I didn't jump when the phone rang. I said hello and this is what I heard on the other, mind you the caller DID NOT give me time to talk; "Chris had an accident, he got bucked off his bull and hit the ground hard and passed out, they took care of him in the arena and put him in the ambulance and we are here at the hospital and they think he broke his collar-bone but he still not awake and we don't any more than that" (breath). I said okay do I need to get down there? (They were in Ohio). Caller: "No I don't think so but we will keep you posted we are going to find out more and we will call you back" CLICK. UGH Well I knew, just knew, that he was going to be okay so I didn't really get to upset. A little later another phone call; "Chris is awake, yep his collar bone is broken, they put a figure 8 on him and he is juiced up on pain medicine, we will be leaving soon and bringing him home, do you want to talk to him?" That was a funny conversation, he apologized, sounded so "out of it" and I told him I loved him and would see him later.
Today we laugh about the entire incident and the phone calls. Well this past Friday night I got a phone call, from Chris, at 12:30am. It went something like this "Hello", Hi honey it's me (really)..."Hi how are you?" "Well I'm okay" (ding ding the light bulb goes off and I'm wide awake)..."I kind of had an accident and I think I re-broke my collar-bone." (dead silence) "Okay, well what happened?" The horse he was riding decided half-way down the arena to start bucking. Chris is a great rider but this caught him off guard and the ground caught him, just right on his bad shoulder. I don't call that a kind-of accident I call it an accident.
Once again I am not there. I didn't see it happen. I did, however, get to see photos from the first time he broke his collar bone. I saw him laying in the arena w/EMS around him and cowboys kneeling to pray. I did cry then as I've never seen him passed out. But with age comes wisdom...so instead of checking out his hotel room Saturday he stayed another night...he was smart enough to know he needed more "rest" before heading home. Today, Monday, he went to the doctor. Another one of those moments...I didn't even have to push or suggest it to him...with age comes wisdom. So they are saying it is not broke just badly bruised and a possibly a torn muscle.
Broke or Not Broke...that may be question but what is the answer? Will the x-ray show different once it drys and a tech reads it? Will the swelling go down soon? Will he be able to judge the College Nat'l. Finals next week? Guess time will tell.
Broke or Not Broke I still wish I was there with him. To help him, even though he would say he doesn't need help. To hold his hand, the good one. To just be there and be close..I think that is the hardest part of being apart...it is not the lack of sex, the lack of talking and seeing, it is knowing there is nothing you can do for your spouse when they are hurt or are sick. The only think I can do is pray and let him know I love him.
I love you Chris..you ARE MY hero!!!
My husband, Chris, was a professional bull-rider for over 15 years. He has broken over 20 bones in his body and had a few concussions. Everyone always asks me how could I stand it? How could I let him? Well first off he had been riding over 6 years when we met, I couldn't very well tell him to stop. I was young and it was "exciting" to date a bull-rider. Second I stood it because it was part of his life and I gave him up to God each and every ride to keep him safe. I knew there would harm, not a question of if he gets hurt but a question of when and how bad.
Chris retired from bull-riding about 15 years ago. He went out on top, winning a local rodeo here in Michigan. I remember clearly a phone call I got one night. Usually I would attend each and every rodeo but with the girls and the cost it was cheaper to have him jump in the truck with a group of guys. I remember the night so clearly. I put the girls to bed, picked up around the house and I went to bed. Knowing that I'd get a call later in the night from Chris telling me how he did. So I didn't jump when the phone rang. I said hello and this is what I heard on the other, mind you the caller DID NOT give me time to talk; "Chris had an accident, he got bucked off his bull and hit the ground hard and passed out, they took care of him in the arena and put him in the ambulance and we are here at the hospital and they think he broke his collar-bone but he still not awake and we don't any more than that" (breath). I said okay do I need to get down there? (They were in Ohio). Caller: "No I don't think so but we will keep you posted we are going to find out more and we will call you back" CLICK. UGH Well I knew, just knew, that he was going to be okay so I didn't really get to upset. A little later another phone call; "Chris is awake, yep his collar bone is broken, they put a figure 8 on him and he is juiced up on pain medicine, we will be leaving soon and bringing him home, do you want to talk to him?" That was a funny conversation, he apologized, sounded so "out of it" and I told him I loved him and would see him later.
Today we laugh about the entire incident and the phone calls. Well this past Friday night I got a phone call, from Chris, at 12:30am. It went something like this "Hello", Hi honey it's me (really)..."Hi how are you?" "Well I'm okay" (ding ding the light bulb goes off and I'm wide awake)..."I kind of had an accident and I think I re-broke my collar-bone." (dead silence) "Okay, well what happened?" The horse he was riding decided half-way down the arena to start bucking. Chris is a great rider but this caught him off guard and the ground caught him, just right on his bad shoulder. I don't call that a kind-of accident I call it an accident.
Once again I am not there. I didn't see it happen. I did, however, get to see photos from the first time he broke his collar bone. I saw him laying in the arena w/EMS around him and cowboys kneeling to pray. I did cry then as I've never seen him passed out. But with age comes wisdom...so instead of checking out his hotel room Saturday he stayed another night...he was smart enough to know he needed more "rest" before heading home. Today, Monday, he went to the doctor. Another one of those moments...I didn't even have to push or suggest it to him...with age comes wisdom. So they are saying it is not broke just badly bruised and a possibly a torn muscle.
Broke or Not Broke...that may be question but what is the answer? Will the x-ray show different once it drys and a tech reads it? Will the swelling go down soon? Will he be able to judge the College Nat'l. Finals next week? Guess time will tell.
Broke or Not Broke I still wish I was there with him. To help him, even though he would say he doesn't need help. To hold his hand, the good one. To just be there and be close..I think that is the hardest part of being apart...it is not the lack of sex, the lack of talking and seeing, it is knowing there is nothing you can do for your spouse when they are hurt or are sick. The only think I can do is pray and let him know I love him.
I love you Chris..you ARE MY hero!!!
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Doing it all with a funny laugh!!!
So not having the hubby living here has posed some funny situations. Thank goodness I am NOT a "princess" and expect things to get done for me..they'd never get done LOL Friday night I was sitting at the dining table on the computer while it was raining..all of a sudden out the kitchen window I heard a "waterfall". I went out and looked at that corner and found the rain water gushing out of a seam in the gutter...way above the bottom drain area. UGH So I grabbed a stick and stuck it up the gutter and out came some gunk..but the waterfall was still falling. Saturday morning I got up and set out to tackle the clogged gutters because I know how important it is for the water to flow away from the house..not form a lake at each corner.
I took the long gutter part that comes off of the bottom and takes the water away from the house...HUH it was so heavy..guess that was due to the fact that there were roots and dirt growing in it! Banged it out, yuck. Grabbed a metal rod and stuck it up the gutter..nope no luck. So off came about 3 foot of gutter and out came the pressure hose. Needless to say, the water is now flowing properly. But YICK Got the back 2 corners fixed..guess I better work on the front 2 corners?
So last night, Saturday, we had major rain..no waterfalls outside the kitchen window. Although this morning the back yard looks like a small lake. That has never happened in June. So I went outside to survey any damage..lukily no trees down or major branches. Just a lot of water. As I'm walking back to the house I hear a little 'chirp' and look down. Awww a baby robin, not a little little baby but one that looks like it is just ready to leave the nest. Well it left alright..via the storm. Poor little guy/girl he was a tad ruffled. Luckily Jack, my jack russell, did not see him. I grabbed some gloves, a box and went to the resuce. As I approached he screamed and tried to fly across the yard...well Jack saw him then. Quickly tossed the box on top to save him from certain dog death. Meanwhile the mother bird is screaming at me!! AT ME how dare she I'm trying to save her baby. Got the birdy in the box and took said birdy to the front yard and placed him under the big tree. With a prayer he will be okay.
From gutter cleaner outer to birdy saving..I can do it all~~with a funny laugh of course!!!
I took the long gutter part that comes off of the bottom and takes the water away from the house...HUH it was so heavy..guess that was due to the fact that there were roots and dirt growing in it! Banged it out, yuck. Grabbed a metal rod and stuck it up the gutter..nope no luck. So off came about 3 foot of gutter and out came the pressure hose. Needless to say, the water is now flowing properly. But YICK Got the back 2 corners fixed..guess I better work on the front 2 corners?
So last night, Saturday, we had major rain..no waterfalls outside the kitchen window. Although this morning the back yard looks like a small lake. That has never happened in June. So I went outside to survey any damage..lukily no trees down or major branches. Just a lot of water. As I'm walking back to the house I hear a little 'chirp' and look down. Awww a baby robin, not a little little baby but one that looks like it is just ready to leave the nest. Well it left alright..via the storm. Poor little guy/girl he was a tad ruffled. Luckily Jack, my jack russell, did not see him. I grabbed some gloves, a box and went to the resuce. As I approached he screamed and tried to fly across the yard...well Jack saw him then. Quickly tossed the box on top to save him from certain dog death. Meanwhile the mother bird is screaming at me!! AT ME how dare she I'm trying to save her baby. Got the birdy in the box and took said birdy to the front yard and placed him under the big tree. With a prayer he will be okay.
From gutter cleaner outer to birdy saving..I can do it all~~with a funny laugh of course!!!
Saturday, June 5, 2010
WHAT A BLESSING!
Saturday, June 5th, just another ordinary day in the Bastien household~~the Michigan location that is! Got up, got around, had some breakfast and went upstairs to get dressed. I noticed the mail had come already so I grabbed it out of the box. A stack of "bills", I groaned. I proceeded to just drop on the table and thought I'd glance thru real quick as I'm expecting Chris' pay-check any day now. I noticed a plain white envelope addressed to me. The return address, I did not recognize. "A late notice", I thought. So with a groan I opened it. Inside a gift, a big gift, one that I would NEVER have expected to find mailed to me. I started to cry as I read the typed note, "There are angels on earth. Someday give the gift to someone else." That was it, nothing else, except the gift! I called Cassie down and handed it to her. She opened it up, read the note and her hands started to shake. We tried to trace the return address..no such street here in Livonia. WOW What a gift. Whomever sent it to us will never know how I am feeling, still, today. I will, one day, pass this gift on. Maybe it is from a friend of mine whom we helped out a few years ago at Christmas time? A friend? Maybe it is from a relative? Someone from church? Someone I don't even know? I would like to thank them face to face but somehow, someway, I just know they know how grateful I am, how grateful my family is.
WOW ... GOD IS GREAT! We may never know when, where or even how great things happen, but they do..they just do. So until I can pass on this gift to someone else I will work on passing on other "gifts"; A smile to someone that looks down, an ear to listen, open a door, help someone...etc. But as I write this I realize I've been doing those things, maybe not as often as I should have but I try each and every day to do something for someone else, no matter what it is. A few weeks ago I helped an elderly lady load her groceries into her car. She had a cart-full and was alone. I felt so good afterwards. I didn't do it to get a "reward" or a "gift" I did it because it felt right. Just as I know my "angel" gave me this gift today because it felt right for them. WOW
Maybe I shouldn't be sharing this with everyone today? But how can I not. I want the world to know that there ARE people out there that simply help others out of the kindness in their hearts w/o ANY strings attached. So when you are down, feel like no one really cares, just know that out there somewhere someone really does care. Someone is praying for you, thinking of you and will be there for you. Don't ever give up on the goodness...it is still there!!!
So I will continue to do those things that just feel right. Because somewhere, someday I'll get that ultimate GIFT when the doors to heaven open for me. Maybe on that day the "angel" here on earth will be standing there (if they've gone before me) and say hey "guess what it was me..I knew you wanted to know". Or if I go before I'll be standing there with a greeting and say "hey I've been wanting to say thank you to YOU...YOU ROCK!!!"
WOW ... GOD IS GREAT! We may never know when, where or even how great things happen, but they do..they just do. So until I can pass on this gift to someone else I will work on passing on other "gifts"; A smile to someone that looks down, an ear to listen, open a door, help someone...etc. But as I write this I realize I've been doing those things, maybe not as often as I should have but I try each and every day to do something for someone else, no matter what it is. A few weeks ago I helped an elderly lady load her groceries into her car. She had a cart-full and was alone. I felt so good afterwards. I didn't do it to get a "reward" or a "gift" I did it because it felt right. Just as I know my "angel" gave me this gift today because it felt right for them. WOW
Maybe I shouldn't be sharing this with everyone today? But how can I not. I want the world to know that there ARE people out there that simply help others out of the kindness in their hearts w/o ANY strings attached. So when you are down, feel like no one really cares, just know that out there somewhere someone really does care. Someone is praying for you, thinking of you and will be there for you. Don't ever give up on the goodness...it is still there!!!
So I will continue to do those things that just feel right. Because somewhere, someday I'll get that ultimate GIFT when the doors to heaven open for me. Maybe on that day the "angel" here on earth will be standing there (if they've gone before me) and say hey "guess what it was me..I knew you wanted to know". Or if I go before I'll be standing there with a greeting and say "hey I've been wanting to say thank you to YOU...YOU ROCK!!!"
Friday, June 4, 2010
SO WHAT IF IT IS BROKE...YOU ARE GETTING A GOOD DEAL!!
UGH Well we had a 2nd showing on the house the other day. The realtor and the clients asked questions, stayed a long time and seemed REALLY interested. I was excited..guess I should not have been. My realtor sent my the email that their realtor sent. Although they REALLY like the house they have some concerns about the concrete drive and the broken garage door. Due to that they are going to continue looking. What the HECK!!! Okay the door IS NOT broken, it is old, very old. It still opens and closes. The concrete, yep it will eventually need replaced like most of the other drives in the neighborhood due to the trees.
Five years ago we got this house appraised and it came out at $205,000! Four years ago the same floor plan house with a SMALLER yard sold for $210,000. We currently have ours listed at $139,700. PEOPLE and REALTORS wake the heck up the coffee is burning.
If that is ALL they are concerned about then if I was their realtor I'd be like okay well let's see if they will come off the price a little bit or give monies back at closing. START SOMEWHERE!!! Even my realtor agreeded with me on that.
Do people NOT understand the lack of jobs out there? Since when did realtors STOP working for their clients? They don't drive you around anymore, they don't have ALL the home information BEFORE they arrive. You don't know how many times I've heard, FROM THE REALTOR, as they are walking in the front door..."oh this has 4 bedrooms?" WOW it is on the listing sheet. Or how about the one that came in and we were out of their price range...PLEASE STOP WAISTING MY TIME!!! Most realtors, and I'm sorry if you are one, keep bankers hours. In this market today you CAN'T!!!
Our realtors, the selling one here in Michigan and our one in Oklahoma, start their days at 8am and work till late in the day. They both do alot of phone work, advertising and showings. We have had over 15 showings since we listed 2 months ago..the most ever. I know we will get an offer soon. But the waiting and watching is killing me.
Unfortunately the media has killed real-estate sales. Every day on TV you can hear about.."how to get a great deal", "homes under $???? all across the United States", "don't settle". Yes there are great deals out there, trust me I know this, but people always want something for nothing. Don't forget you are already practically getting that something for nothing. Our house is $60,000+ below the appraised value..yes I know it won't appraise for $205,000 now but it is still a GREAT deal.
So what it if the garage door is broken, it still opens and closes. The rest of the house is great, and I'm not just saying that. I guess all I can really say is OKAY I hope you find what you are looking for. I am realistic when home shopping...I want good structure, updated electric and plumbing, and nothing that requires over a $10,000 fix. All the rest, a broken door, cracked concrete, bad paint..all that can be replaced or re-painted. With a good strong foundation you can do anything.
Five years ago we got this house appraised and it came out at $205,000! Four years ago the same floor plan house with a SMALLER yard sold for $210,000. We currently have ours listed at $139,700. PEOPLE and REALTORS wake the heck up the coffee is burning.
If that is ALL they are concerned about then if I was their realtor I'd be like okay well let's see if they will come off the price a little bit or give monies back at closing. START SOMEWHERE!!! Even my realtor agreeded with me on that.
Do people NOT understand the lack of jobs out there? Since when did realtors STOP working for their clients? They don't drive you around anymore, they don't have ALL the home information BEFORE they arrive. You don't know how many times I've heard, FROM THE REALTOR, as they are walking in the front door..."oh this has 4 bedrooms?" WOW it is on the listing sheet. Or how about the one that came in and we were out of their price range...PLEASE STOP WAISTING MY TIME!!! Most realtors, and I'm sorry if you are one, keep bankers hours. In this market today you CAN'T!!!
Our realtors, the selling one here in Michigan and our one in Oklahoma, start their days at 8am and work till late in the day. They both do alot of phone work, advertising and showings. We have had over 15 showings since we listed 2 months ago..the most ever. I know we will get an offer soon. But the waiting and watching is killing me.
Unfortunately the media has killed real-estate sales. Every day on TV you can hear about.."how to get a great deal", "homes under $???? all across the United States", "don't settle". Yes there are great deals out there, trust me I know this, but people always want something for nothing. Don't forget you are already practically getting that something for nothing. Our house is $60,000+ below the appraised value..yes I know it won't appraise for $205,000 now but it is still a GREAT deal.
So what it if the garage door is broken, it still opens and closes. The rest of the house is great, and I'm not just saying that. I guess all I can really say is OKAY I hope you find what you are looking for. I am realistic when home shopping...I want good structure, updated electric and plumbing, and nothing that requires over a $10,000 fix. All the rest, a broken door, cracked concrete, bad paint..all that can be replaced or re-painted. With a good strong foundation you can do anything.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
7 Month Mark---SERENITY, WISDOM, COURAGE
Yep it is official, we've been living apart for 7 months as of May 28th(ish). This sucks, big time, still. AND the last time we were together was over Easter, the 1st week in April. That has been the longest "not had a visit time" yet. That suck, big time, too!! I've noticed over the past few months that people have stopped asking how we are doing, how are we managing, are "we" okay. I feel like "we" are on the back burner and that is hard to understand. But in this day and age people are busy, busier than ever and unfortunately we don't have time for others. And that sucks, big time, too.
I am trying, ever so hard, to stay positive. Thank goodness for my medicine and thank goodness for God. I have noticed, as of late, that Chris is not so positive. How the hell can anyone blame him, I sure can't. We are still struggling to make all the bills with only 1 income and we are behind on the mortgage. So all of that is weighing on him. We still have the house up for sale, we've had showings but no offers as of yet. He is STILL living in our RV and that is "okay", he really doesn't mind that. But what really sucks is that their office moved, just down the street to a smaller building BUT that owner won't let him keep the RV there. "If I let you then I have to let others'." As if anyone else around there is living in their RV..they all have homes to go home to..you know the ones with real walls, nice bathrooms, big kitchens etc. So along with moving the shop, keeping sales up and keeping income coming in he know has to find a place by the 10th to keep the RV and live and that won't cost. HA good-luck with that. The RV parks want $325 and up a month. We just can't swing another bill. If business was doing good then he could justify a "raise" to cover that expense. But business has leveled out, on the low side of level. Just like any other business. So he gets down and I can't blame him. He has the world on his shoulder's, all men do in times like this. At least those men that are "real men". Any man put in the position of being unemployed, digging out or whatever will put the weight of the world on their shoulders because that is how they are wired. They ARE the providers for their family no matter what any women's movement might say.
Yet we can not complain..at least he has a job and we are not living with family and we've not "lost" everything. Credit cards, as bad as they are, are helpful in times like this. So he has bad days and that is okay and I am learning to not take them personally. He is a great guy, the best, and he wants so much for his family.
So how on earth does one stay positive? Personally I've been, on the inside, so sad. But each day I look at the glass plaque above my kitchen sink "God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change COURAGE to change the things I can, and WISDOM to know the difference." I have to believe those words and live by those word and just KNOW things will change and things WILL get better for us. This is just a trial and test and if, no when, we get thru this, things will be better. For ourselves, for each other, for our girls. The tears I shed will one day be memories of the past.
So it has been 7 months, it will, more than likely, be a few more months. An offer on the house would be great! Being able to find a rental down there to live in until this house sells would be great. But neither opportunity has presented itself, YET!!
SERENITY, WISDOM, COURAGE...words to live by.
I am trying, ever so hard, to stay positive. Thank goodness for my medicine and thank goodness for God. I have noticed, as of late, that Chris is not so positive. How the hell can anyone blame him, I sure can't. We are still struggling to make all the bills with only 1 income and we are behind on the mortgage. So all of that is weighing on him. We still have the house up for sale, we've had showings but no offers as of yet. He is STILL living in our RV and that is "okay", he really doesn't mind that. But what really sucks is that their office moved, just down the street to a smaller building BUT that owner won't let him keep the RV there. "If I let you then I have to let others'." As if anyone else around there is living in their RV..they all have homes to go home to..you know the ones with real walls, nice bathrooms, big kitchens etc. So along with moving the shop, keeping sales up and keeping income coming in he know has to find a place by the 10th to keep the RV and live and that won't cost. HA good-luck with that. The RV parks want $325 and up a month. We just can't swing another bill. If business was doing good then he could justify a "raise" to cover that expense. But business has leveled out, on the low side of level. Just like any other business. So he gets down and I can't blame him. He has the world on his shoulder's, all men do in times like this. At least those men that are "real men". Any man put in the position of being unemployed, digging out or whatever will put the weight of the world on their shoulders because that is how they are wired. They ARE the providers for their family no matter what any women's movement might say.
Yet we can not complain..at least he has a job and we are not living with family and we've not "lost" everything. Credit cards, as bad as they are, are helpful in times like this. So he has bad days and that is okay and I am learning to not take them personally. He is a great guy, the best, and he wants so much for his family.
So how on earth does one stay positive? Personally I've been, on the inside, so sad. But each day I look at the glass plaque above my kitchen sink "God grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change COURAGE to change the things I can, and WISDOM to know the difference." I have to believe those words and live by those word and just KNOW things will change and things WILL get better for us. This is just a trial and test and if, no when, we get thru this, things will be better. For ourselves, for each other, for our girls. The tears I shed will one day be memories of the past.
So it has been 7 months, it will, more than likely, be a few more months. An offer on the house would be great! Being able to find a rental down there to live in until this house sells would be great. But neither opportunity has presented itself, YET!!
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